I haven’t written here in a while, and I want to keep more up-to-date. I’m having topic block though, so I thought I would steal from my husband and throw everything at the blog and see what sticks.
* I miss my dog. (He will get his own post soon, but I am not ready yet.)
* My kids miss our dog, and the honesty of their grief is almost overpowering.
* John misses our dog and has managed to be strong and honest and wonderful.
* The kids are going through a major defiant streak. There should be a CrossFit move called Carrying the Preschooler to Timeout. All you have to do is carry a limp punching bag around the room and place it in the corner.
* Despite workout out a lot and recording my calories (and trying to keep them under a certain level), I am not losing weight. The doctor is concerned. He gave me two months to try and change things up and see if the weight comes off before we try any tests or medication. He wants more cardio and suggested no “carbs” for at least a little while. So I have been severely limiting my bpp (bread, pasta, potato) intake. And, fuck it, it is working. But FUCK IT. I hate it. I am not one of these people who will happily post pictures of the mashed cauliflower and spaghetti squash dinners they are loving. I want some mac and cheese stat. I will always want garlic bread. Hamburgers should not be eaten without fries. And I will live by that creed even if I weigh 120 lbs.
* Also it is really annoying that my current obese weight is the healthy weight for someone six inches taller. Sometimes I hate the Greek genes.
* I got my notes back from the editors at Bannerwing whom John hired as a Mother’s Day present. I have also met with them via Facebook chat. I am overwhelmed and energized by rewrites all at the same time. I am really hoping to have a publish-ready manuscript by the end of the year.
* I wish I could think of my writing as serious and not as a hobby or something that takes away time from things I should be doing.
* In August I leave my husband and kids behind to attend a wedding in Napa Valley. On one hand, I am thrilled for a get-away to a place I have not been with family with whom I do not get to spend much time. On the other hand, I am going to wine country without John. On a third hand, I am glad the kids will be with him because then I don’t have to worry as much about what is going on at home. I know he’s got it. It would be different if we had to leave them with another family member. So less worry, but no romantic wine tastings. I am conflicted.
* Our trip to the beach can not come soon enough. Four weeks seems so long right now.