I’ll be the first to tell you that owning dogs doesn’t prepare you, in the least, for parenthood. I mean, from the moment you can bring one home, a dog will be just fine if you leave him alone for an hour or two. Sure, you need to give them attention, and feed them, and look after their needs . . . but they’re completely different scopes. The best parallel I’m coming up with is entering a knife fight with a basic knowledge of how to operate a butter knife. Sure, there may be some basics that remain consistent between the two (namely, don’t stab yourself) – but you’re better off saying “I know how to operate a butter knife” and “I know how to win a knife fight”, just like you’re better off saying “I know how to raise dogs” and “I know how to raise kids” (as opposed to the “I know how to raise dogs, and therefore I should know how to raise kids”).
With that said, there is a maneuver that every dog owner knows — how to pretend you’re still sleeping early in the morning. Once you stir, a dog knows you’re up, and that signals the beginning of the day — there is no going back. You’re getting out of bed, you’re taking it for a walk, you’re feeding it. But, sometimes a dog will think “it’s the beginning of the day” and you can convince the dog to go back to sleep by simply staying still.
We employ the same strategy with CJ — he’s a kid, and he emits random noises throughout the night. Sometimes he’ll let out a little cry. Sometimes a fart. Sometimes a laugh . . . if they’re spaced well-enough apart, I employ the “I’m still sleeping, whatever distractions are out there will go back to sleep” maneuver. Nearly always, this maneuver directly leads to the child crying – but not today.
No, today he started laughing. For a good 10-15 minutes before my alarm went off (at the very evil time of 5AM because I’m a glutton for punishment), CJ sat in his crib, laughing. It wasn’t constant laughter, but he would let out a happy little squeak every minute or two. When the evil alarm finally chimed in, I walked over, picked him up, changed his diaper (he had not soaked through), and got him over to mommy for feeding while I dealt with the dreaded puppies and their demands for exercise and food.
Now, if only every morning was as simple…