Introducing Leila and When Parenting is Different

All in all, Leila came into the world in a pretty straightforward way. John and I were at the hospital bright and early (5:30 in the AM) on Monday June 14th, and she was here by 7:30 at 7 lbs 11 oz, 19.5 inches, which because the universe likes order, were CJ’s exact measurements at birth. John got to see her being born, and I got a brief kiss before they took her to the nursery while the surgery was finished. John went with her.

I finally got to really hold her around 9 AM. I think the picture speaks for itself.

John kind of likes her too.

And finally, the family was all together.

We’ve been home for a week, and so far, things are going pretty well. I am still healing, but I feel more and more like me every day. And a pre-pregnancy me at that! I almost forgot what it felt like not to have a moving bowling ball beating me up from the inside. She felt so big inside but looks so little on the outside! It’s been a joy getting to know her, but it has definitely been a different experience than adopting CJ. We went through so much before he came, that when he was placed in my arms, I just hit the ground running as Mom with a lot of confidence. And I realize I was expecting the same thing when Leila came, but it hasn’t quite been that way. When you add the physical stress of surgery, hormones, breastfeeding and two infants to the mix, some of my confidence went out the window. I will admit to daily crying for a couple of days, sometimes over a stupid TV show, sometimes over worrying about how much Leila was getting to eat. Being the sole source of nutrition for an infant is a lot of pressure especially when your own body is all whacked out from birth and surgery. So it was touch and go for a while. Thank goodness I have John who is just a rock and did EVERYTHING else while I hobbled around and felt like a giant breast, and of course so many family members and friends. The worst didn’t last very long, and now things are getting into a bit of a routine, the hormones are diminishing and I am getting that confident Mom feeling back and enjoying our miracles.
Because, really, with these three as mine, hormones don’t stand a chance!

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