Name That Tune for Realsies

On December 2nd, we went to a wedding. There was an open bar. This took place in the car driving home from my mother-in-law’s who had been watching the kids. The bold lyrics are me. The italics are John.

Silent night, holy night

Silent night, quiet night

All is calm. All is bright.

All is come. All is (either bright or night, uncertain.)

‘Round yon virgin mother and child.

‘Round yon virgin children.

Holy infant so tender and mild.

Holy infant so tender and mild.

Sleep in heavenly peace. 

Sleep in heavily peace.

Sleep in heavenly peace.

Sleep in heavenly peace.

There is a small pause in the car. Before….

Deck the halls with boughs of holly.

Deck the halls with balls of horry. (Yes, he went there.)

Fa la la la la la la la la

Fa la la la la la la la la (He wasn’t drunk enough to flub that.)

‘Tis the season to be jolly.

Is the season to be jorry.

Fa la la la la la la la la

Don we now our gay apparel.

Dawn we now our gay party. (I am assuming he had the wrong dawn.)

Fa la la la la la la la la

Toll the ancient yule tide carol.

I don’t know the goddamn words.

John!

Sorry. I don’t know the gosh darn words.

Fa la la la la la la la la

Fa la la la la la la la la

Another short pause

John: You’ve got the words. I’ve got the tune.

Me: Excuse me? My tune is fine.

John: I might not know the words, but I know the key.

I take the high road.

The first noel the angels did say

Noel, noel, angels did say

Was to certain poor shepards in fields where they lay.

Was to certain poor shepards in fields where they lay.

In fields where they lay, lay keeping their sheep

In fields where they lay, lay feeding their sheep

On a cold winter’s night that was so deep.

On a cold winter’s night that was so deep.

Noel, noel, noel, noel

Noel, noel, noel, noel

Born is the king of Israel

Noel, noel, noel, noel

Me: Lay feeding their sheep?

John: Yes. That is the right word.

Me: No, it’s not. It is keeping their sheep.

John: What does that mean? Keeping their sheep? They feed their sheep.

Me: They keep the sheep. They keep them safe. They aren’t feeding the sheep while they are laying in the field.

John: CJ, do you keep or feed sheep? CJ?

CJ is asleep. Leila is asleep.

Me: NPR?

John: Sure.

Merry Christmas, Everyone!

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